You and My Sick Desires
by DreamswithJoy
Summary: You remember those good times, right? Those times before my desire took over me, right? Because I've done something beyond sinful...twoshot. Inspired by renahh chen's "For a Sick Boy". :D contains twincest.
1. Chapter 1

*I don't own Vocaloid. But I do own this twoshot idea. Which I got after reading "For a Sick Boy" by renahh chen. Yeah XD*

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><p>"I'm scared."<p>

Is that how you feel right now?

How hypocritical. And earlier, you wanted to _help _me. Awwwww.

Psh. You still do?

Do you ever know when to stop? Or is that just a part of your "charm"?

Charm. What a stupid word. A word only used by liars. How pathetic.

You don't think so? You must be naïve then. You're not? Oh…well continued to tell yourself that.

"Why are you acting like this?"

Is that what you're asking yourself over and over?

Why do you even try? I'm too broken to be fixed. Too fucked up for anyone to bother to come near me anymore.

A cheerful façade? Is that what you think I had at school? You don't? Wow…you understand me better than I thought you did.

Oh yeah! You're my best friend! Silly me…all my desires are making me forget these things, you know?

But you…are far too "pure" for someone like me.

Pure. That's a dumb word as well. I remember the one who used to call me that. But I don't know where he is now. Maybe he's down the rabbit hole?

That was supposed to be a joke. But I don't think I killed him. I can't be sure though. My mind's been a little blurry lately. Have you felt like that before?

Oh. You have? Yeah…it is tough. Isn't it?

So….you want to know what happened right? Are you sure? You just got back from vacation….

Well….I apologize if this taints you.

You're right….it is about Len. What did he do this time? No, it was all my fault….and the bitch Hatsune but….that's another story.

What happened to her? Don't worry about it now. I'll explain from the very beginning.

Len. You remember he's my brother, right? And that I love him very much right?

You know I love him in a non sibling way, right?

Good. You do know… you're our childhood friend! I didn't remember if I told you that or not. Silly me! I haven't been remembering anything lately.

Do you remember our childhood? The three of us always used to play in the sandbox! But then she came. And he came. Then it got sour. Then everyone else came. That made it a little better. But of course, Len didn't see anything though. His heart was never broken like mine.

He was perfect. I was…and still am broken into tiny little shards.

"Are you okay?"

Please don't ask that…I'm not fine. Not at all. I still have Hatsune's tie. Urgh. It actually suits a slut like her. Fucking bitch.

…oh! I got a little off track there! But, do you remember when the bitch and Kaito came into our group? They ruined everything. She was always hanging onto him. He was always flirting with me.

Eventually, Len started dating the slut and I started dating Kaito. He wasn't the best boyfriend. But not really that bad either. The few times I made out with him were boring. But he seemed to like it. Well, he also liked it when I got more enthusiastic because I saw Len and that….skank making out on the fucking couch.

I wanted to kill her right there right then…but I didn't. High self control? Hell yes. Wait. I kinda lost it last night soooo….I guess it doesn't count as self control, does it? Heh. Kinda funny, right?

I can tell your laugh is nervous.

…anyway! I realized that my boyfriend and the slut weren't loyal….see? They both were oh so similar. With their desires fro popularity, their overall perkiness….oh yeah….that was fake, and that desire for getting laid. Urgh. They both make me sick.

I haven't seen Kaito in a while, I wonder what happened to him.

"Did you kill him?"

No! I didn't kill him! Why would _I _kill anyone? I haven't hated anyone…except the Hatsune….my whole life! Everyone's called me _forgiving, kind, virtuous, cheerful, optimistic, _and so many other things! How could I possibly hate more than one person?

But, I have to get back to the story at hand here! I saw the bitch and Kaito…fucking each other on my bed. I saw Len come up to see why I was taking so long to bring them some food. He saw it too. His eyes blazed with fury, and mine did too.

I wouldn't allow anyone to hurt him like that. I didn't care for Kaito, so I didn't really mind when he was screwing Hatsune. What I did mind was that the little slut was cheating on him. With his "best friend". Fucking asstard Kaito.

"How did you kill her?"

That was easy. Just took her out into the sandbox and stabbed her. Took her little tie, cut off her hair, I pretty much tore apart the bitch. Wanna see? I buried her in the sandbox. Oh! Silly me! That's disgusting! You wouldn't want to see that! Ewwwww!

Can we not talk about those two anymore? I don't feel good when I talk about them. Can we talk about Len now? I like to talk about him. ….I'm blushing more than usual? Oh….that's because I had some dreams. I imagined he was…er….ummmm….having sex with me! Yeah…it was a sick little dream, wasn't it?

Did you know that's why I always get my hair combed thoroughly? In my dreams, he always runs his hands through my hair. I always make sure I have absolutely no pimples as well. He likes to touch me in my dreams….in my thigh and such.

"How erotic."

It really is. But it's hard to concentrate in class now. I always think of those dreams and the teacher scolds me. Everything seems so normal. Everyone thinks Hatsune's on vacation. Everyone thinks Kaito is as well. No one knows of my sick desires and I like to keep it that way. I hope you keep this a secret. I really do.

"What are you going to do?"

You know I have a gun in my pocket right? You know I have it at my head? Now you know what I'm going to do, don't you?

"Why?"

….because I fucked my own brother, that's why. I remember how last night, I pinned him against the wall and kissed him. And we did it. And I liked it. It felt so much better than those fantasies. But you know what? He was probably using me…just to get over the slut! I hate that….I can't face him anymore. What better way to escape than death?

"RIN!"

Len?

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><p>*to be continued…..in da next chappie! Lol…..that was odd to write (but fun never the less)…..except my parents are PISSSED! Leave a review ppl!*<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

*Vocaloid is something I don't own. To Bree-Bee233: Thanks :D. And this is a twoshot. To Pilpols (): hi there! :3 that's good (cause it WAS my inspiration and all), but I hope it doesn't look too much like it (I don't want to steal everything about the fic after all). To hidarichan81: You do? That's good ^^. And my parents were pissed cause I was on the cpu waaaay to long (again). To Ness Caelum: I now feel disappointed in myself for not updating this quicker. XD To kuri L.b: yay~ I'm glad you like it! :3 hopefully, I didn't offend rennah-chen by doing this though. To Tootired2login (): Yay! :D I just wanted to do something with crazy people and with a POV similar to rennah-chen's. This is the result!*

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><p>Hurry up, get the gun away from her dammit!<p>

"Don't try and stop me Len, I'm already too sick to be cured…."

Ow! Yes! I got it! Here, catch it!

"Okay!"

Hide it somewhere! Hurry!

"Alright."

"No….don't do this to me….."

Run! Run! Run! Wait….where are you going?

The sandbox? Fine, fine. But what are you going to do there? Make sure you grab a tissue to wipe that thing off though.

Oh! You're finally back! Rin just fainted when you left, she's in her bed! What did you do?

….wait…._who _was buried there?

"You must hate her, don't you?"

Of course not! She's _Rin _for God's sake! I can always forgive her!

Hey, do you mind if I tell you a secret?

I never really loved Miku. Hell, I didn't even _like _her all that much.

Surprised, aren't you? I always was good at acting!

But can I tell you another secret?

You know that asshole Kaito, right?

You do? Oh….I'm getting forgetful….of _course _you do! We all used to hang out together. God, I'm so silly.

Well, people always say not to say His name in vain, but I never like religion. Remember how I told you that? Rin was always different though. She _hated _all that stuff in the Bible, but she believed in God with all her heart and soul. Maybe that's why she tried to…..but what could she possibly have done wrong?

….oh, I'll think later! I'm far too tired right now!

But I really hated Kaito…..

I tried to accept him as a friend and all, making him my "best friend" and such, but that strong dislike for him kept on coming back. But I didn't want to dump the guy or anything, regardless if he was what one would call a manwhore…..

"Isn't that a rude term to use?"

But it's true. Everyone, including myself, knew that was a fact. Everyone except Rin.

She's so innocent, why would she say she was sick? I don't know….

Oh….I'm spacing out way too much again….silly old me. And I'm supposed to be the serious twin. Cool and collected….when did that all change? I don't know the answer to that either. Wow, I really do sound dumb now. Don't I?

But, I should get back to Kaito, shouldn't I?

Yeah, yeah. That's what I should do now.

Well, first it was you, Rin, and I. We did everything together, don't you remember?

Then they came.

Miku and Kaito _seemed _nice, but they really weren't.

I don't remember how or why I went out with Miku, I just did. But I do remember her practically begging me to go out with her, and being the person I am, I agreed.

I just remember how furious I was when I figured out Rin and that… _thing _were dating. It made me sick to the core.

Have you ever felt that way before? I forgot…..sorry. What a bad friend I am….

Oh yeah! I gotta get back to telling my story! Yeah!

Well, Miku wasn't the greatest girlfriend. But I didn't care if she cheated or not, because I never really liked her.

Hey, do you remember that sleepover we had at your place when we were younger?

That day, all the people in my class (which as you already know was different than Rin and your class) were talking about stuff like kissing and romance. It was rather embarrassing when people started doing "Truth or Dare" in the middle of class. They dared me to kiss someone by the end of the day (not the school day, the whole day) or else they would er…..I would rather not say. But, it was pretty cruel.

So, when we were all playing video games and both you and Rin fell asleep, I looked up at the clock and realized what would happen if I didn't kiss someone. Fear…..it kinda took over me at that moment…

I knew you would hate me if I kissed you, so I kissed Rin on impulse and took a picture.

Disgusting, right? I'm such a sick person, aren't I?

I'm pretty grateful I photoshopped it though, no one knew that girl was really Rin. I never knew I could use it so well. ….no wonder I got an A plus in art class! Wow!

And that's when I thought about hugging her. Then it was kissing, touching, things like that.

Then the dreams started to come.

I'm so disgusting…having dreams of doing _those things _with my twin sister….but I just can't help it….and it hurts to not be able to do a damn thing.

I became more "distant", because my own presence hurt her. I know, how stereotypical, right? But it's so, so true, don't you think?

"Len….."

No! It IS true dammit! Don't try and say otherwise! Don't!

….I've gotten off track again! That's not good at all!

But er….eventually, after Rin and that guy began to date and all, I saw him er….

He was kissing Miki, Rin's friend.

'Strike one!' were the words that rang through me head.

But he said it was an accident, that he tripped and fell. I knew he was lying, but thought that if Rin was happy, then I should forgive him just once. I was a fool. But you already know that, don't you?

About three weeks later, I remember seeing him touching Akita Neru, Rin's enemy. She was moaning a lot, and I felt really weird. Her top was off…and so was his…..and…..he was doing really er…. "naughty" things with her.

"Naughty" is the correct word….yeah….

And 'Strike Two!' was all that could run through my mind. Weird, right?

Right? Tell me!

"Right…yes…right…."

Good! We understand each other now! That's nice! Well…..you always understood me….so we understand each other _more! _Mhm, that's it!

I knew _that _wasn't an accident! But he promised not to do it again once I threatened to tell Rin what he was doing. So, I decided to let it slide one last time, see? Do you see? Do you?

"I do…"

Good! That's nice! I don't have to explain all over again! You know I don't like doing that, right? Oh. Of course you do…silly old me!

And last night, when I saw him having er…..sex with Miku…..I got really mad.

Rin was getting something up to them…what was it? Oh! She was bringing some food up! Yes, yes! And then she dropped the plate, see? I went up to see if she was alright and….I saw them.

It didn't hurt because she cheated on me. I had seen that a lot before.

No, it hurt because he cheated on Rin, see?

I remember how mad we both were, and how much it hurt me to see the one I love like this.

And all I could think was, 'Strike Three! You're out of the game!'

So, that night, I killed him.

"Oh my…."

Simple, right?

I just cut him up, just like that! See? And I buried him in the sandbox! The one we always used to play at! That one! Remember?

You do! That's good!

Um…..I bet you wouldn't want to see his remains…..that's gross….

Heh….yeah….that would be really gross…..disgusting…..sick…..

Oh! I went off track all over again! Let's get back to this, shall we?

So, when I got home and took a bath, I was going to check up on Rin to see how she was doing.

And somehow, _we _had sex.

Twisted, right? You want to run away, don't you? Tell me dammit!

…..that's all…so tell me something now…..

Are you disgusted by my sick desires?

"I need a breath of air. I still have to unpack you know!"

Oh. I forgot about that! Bye…..

"Wait Len!"

What is it?

"Go tell Rin everything you just told me. No excuses, just do it. Lies are only going to make it worse. Call me when you do that."

But-

"Don't give me excuses Len. Just tell her, you won't get the answers you expected. I guarantee that."

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><p><span>Fifteen years later~<span>

You are standing in front of a twin grave, a sad smile on your lips. Tears are running down your cheeks, and your eyes are filled with an all too familiar sadness.

"….first you….now them? Rin, Len, I don't know what I'm going to do anymore! Damn it! I saw them kissing!"

You then sat down in front of the grave, facing it like you were facing a human being.

"Remember after that moment all those years ago, how I realized how the story wasn't going to have a happy ending? It hurt like hell. Remember? Then you, Rin, figured out you were pregnant with your own brother's child. I remember holding you all night. You were so scared of what would happen." You took a breath in and began to speak again.

"So we all lied and said it was Kaito's. Your parents were pissed and all, but they "understood" eventually. Then, Ren and Lin were born. I remember the bold joy you (Rin) showed and the hidden joy you (Len) showed. It made me want to cry, out of happiness and sadness." Your tears were already dripping down even faster, but you didn't notice and just continued to talk.

"And then that girl….Neru…spilled it all out. You two killed yourselves the next day. We never even said goodbye. But I took care of your children, everyone else was too unfit or too prejudiced. It was hard, but Ren and Lin turned out to be two wonderful children. Great students, kindhearted, the whole package. But…." You give a look that matched the night you saw your best friends had killed themselves.

"I saw them kissing! And I don't know what to do! I don't want them to end up like you! I don't want them to die damnit! Just like I didn't want you two to die!"

You began to sob quietly and slowly stood up.

"B-bye R-Lin! B-bye L-Len!" you stuttered as you turned to leave the cemetery, only to see your adopted children looking at you with tears in their eyes.

"So that's why you never told us who our real parents were…." Lin murmured.

"Can you tell us now?" Ren asked you.

You just smiled and sat down.

"Alright, but I'm warning you, this story isn't pretty….."

~END~

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><p>*:D finally! I've been held up and stalled for days! (damn you Fruits Basket in all you glory!) I hope you liked it though!*<p> 


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